BEYOND THE IMPLODE 3 - BRITISH AIRWAYS 0

The Internet's great, because it allows people to act harder than they are in real life. But I bet that if most of YOU received a letter from BRUCE LEE, first thing on Monday morning, informing you that he intended to beat your kidneys out and toss your corpse off a hill, you'd all CRY and WHEEZE into your Coco Pops, before ringing your mums to ask if you could 'lie low' in your old rooms for the next three years.

Where you'd no doubt spend said period browsing Oi! videos on YouTube and calling all the other commenters 'pussies'.

Pah! If Bruce Lee pulls that shit with you ever again, just do what this chap did. Send him a letter back, detailing EXACTLY what he'll get if he tries it on:

NINJAMAN - "ASSASSINATING"

Then again, maybe you're not a vicious something.